OK, obviously my previous post was a big steamy pile of shit.
Happy April Fool's Day.
An unrepentant Attention Whore like me give up blogging? Are you out of your fucking mind? That would be like Dubya giving up lying to Americans. It would be like Cheney giving up shooting his friends. Not gonna happen! Wouldn't be "prudent".
This news story PISSED ME OFF so much I couldn't even wait till tomorrow to post it.
"A Florida homeowners group wants 3-year-old Kimberly Broffman to take her Big Wheel and hit the road.
They've banded together to oust the toddler from their Tampa-area community, which bans residents under 18.
The child's grandparents, Judie and Jimmy Stottler, admit Kimberly's been living there in violation of homeowners' association rules for three years. They said her mother has a drug problem, and isn't capable of caring for the child."
This is why I will NEVER, EVER live in an area that has a Homeowner's Association.
Fucking tight-assed, control-freak, selfish, greedy, goddamned NAZIs!!!
I've been a homeowner several times. Each time I kept my home in good repair, maintained it well, and respected my neighbors.
But goddamn it, if I OWN a piece of land, then it is fucking MINE! It is the Principality of Fucking Onassis. It is XOland. It is my fucking domain and I will do with it as I please. I'll build guard towers, post snipers and issue passports and visas to regulate who may or may not set foot on my land. If I want to paint my house Rescue Orange and turn my yard into a dandelion orchard, then By God that's what I'll fucking do!
I'll be goddamned to hell if I will PAY a group of cocksucking doorknobs to dictate to me what I can and cannot do with my own fucking property!
If you want to tell me what color my house can be, what materiels my roof can be made of, how tall my grass can be, what I can and cannot have in my driveway, what signs I can display, whether or not I can have a storage shed or who can live in MY FUCKING HOUSE, then you better be prepared to start paying a hefty percentage of my mortgage.
All of that having been said, what kind of old, tired, dried up, bitter, cranky, twisted, fucktard can't find unmitigated JOY in watching a little kid tool up and down a sidewalk on a Big Wheel? Hell, I wish they made adult sized Big Wheels so I could ride up and down the street. That was like the earliest taste of FREEDOM! And it was SWEET!
If you are so fucking old and heartless that you are sufficiently annoyed by little kids on tricycles that you feel compelled to hire a lawyer and go to court to put a stop to it, then do the world a favor and just walk out in front of a bus.
The sooner you are dead, the better.
Are you sure that me continuing to have a blog is such a good idea?