Thursday, May 24, 2007

Bush: If Iraq Says Leave, "We Would Leave."

Oh, I'm sure! I've got 20 bucks says they "ask us to leave" before the General Election. Any takers? Anyone? Anyone? Hello!

But this quote just gags me:

"We are there at the invitation of the Iraqi government. This is a sovereign nation."

Okey dokey! I'm pretty sure that Iraq was, by all international and legal definitions a "sovereign nation" before we got there. If The Pentagon can release al Qaeda torture manuals to The Smoking Gun, maybe they wouldn't mind releasing that letter from Saddam to Dubya where he said

"You know buddy, I'm really getting sick of this shit. It's all become too easy. No one in my country dares to even speak ill of me, let alone try to over throw me. The jihadi's won't come near me because they know I"ll fuck them up. My neighbors are all scared of me. Your sanctions and No-Fly Zones have me locked down like a prison-bitch. Even the Kurds are just sitting on their Turkish asses waiting for me to die. I'm fucking bored! My boys are assholes, and I don't want to leave them shit.

So I'm wondering if you could do me a little favor. You know for old times sake (remember the Iran/Iraq War? Those were some good times! Memories!) I was wondering (if it wouldn't be too much trouble) if you could come in here and really stir some shit up! You know, I'm talking Shock and Awe! Bomb the fuck out of everything in sight, destroy the infrastructure, put everyone out of work, terrorize my people, lock them up and torture them without any semblance of Due Process, set up bases in my old palaces, kill my sons and hang me. If you wouldn't mind doing that for me, I think it would really mix things up and create some excitement.

Once you get here, you can stay as long as you want. Make yourselves at home.

I know you have to run all this by Cheney and Rumsfeld, but get back to me ASAP and let me know if you can help me out. Love you bro.



I'd love to see that invitation.


Dan said...

But if we don't fight them there, they will follow us here!! Remember?!

It's tough to keep all these excuses for killing brown people straight.

Xavier Onassis said...

I don't think they need to "follow us" here.

Pretty sure they already know where we are and how to get here.

Dan said...

No, their only map was on one of those planes. They forgot to make a copy.

crse said...

I love your blog. Its just that simple.

Xavier Onassis said...

crse - Thank you! It's just that simple!