Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Amber Alert CANCELLED for Stinkbait Bouchet

UPDATE: Stinkbait has been found safe (but naked, bruised and mysteriously scratched in his groinal area) at a commune of kindly Mormon transvestites in western Utah who apparently rescued him from a roving band of high-tech renegade Mennonites in Humvees who were equipped with iPods, GPS devices, WiFi-enabled laptops with bookmarked midget porn sites and a bunch of Glocks. They were, however, still plainly dressed. Go figure.

Negotiations to get his family to take him back are currently underway. His subordinates from work are taking a collection to bribe the Mormon TVs to hold him in thrall.

Search teams are instructed to STAND DOWN and return to their homes.


I haven't been able to connect to "...And Then I Said" today.

Whassup, Stink?

Where ya at man?

Yer scarin' me.

Come out, come out wherever you are!


Stinkbait Boucher said...

Man. Some mofo spilled Mountain Dew on the servers or some shit like that.


I had BETTER be up and online by tomorrow...

Stinkbait Boucher said...

One good thing though - with no servers to distract me I've been able to catch up on Doubting Faith.

Nice work. How do you find the time?

Xavier Onassis said...

Glad that's all it was. I almost soiled my Depends!

For future reference, I need an email for you. I was going to send you a picture I took of a can of Old Bay seasoning and realized I didn't have one.

Shoot me a line at xo64068 at yahoo dot com. M'kay?

Xavier Onassis said...

Hey my friend, let me tell ya...between online porn and getting my drink on, it ain't easy! I bust my hump just trying to entertain my peeps!

Spyder said...

Good Job! I was doing some sleuty stuff (not slutty!) trying to hunt him down.

Glad he showed up before we had to call Doc in.

Poodles said...

He was in Utah? Well Damn he should have said hi. :P

crse said...

ok we arent mennonites but thanks for the awkward comment about our fashion sense. And the midget porn....well I can explain...it's research...for a project....seriously its good to be among serious stalkers.

Well Hell Michelle said...

"Stinkbait has been found safe at a commune of kindly Mormon transvestites in western Utah..."

Sounds like the plot to a few movies I used to sell. I'll need a pic of Stinkbait to confirm if he was in any of them :)