Friday, August 10, 2012

Fuck You Oklahoma Joe's

I made my first visit to Oklahoma Joe's recently. It will also be my last.

The occasion was a joyous one, meeting up with old friends in from out of town. Got to see and hang out with a group of mutual friends I hadn't seen in a long time. It was awesome.

But I have a real problem with "The Line Rules" at Oklahoma Joe's.  First of all, I don't like the whole fucking concept of going someplace where I am GIVING THEM MY MONEY and before I even get anything of value from them, being presented with THEIR RULES for being their customer!  Fuck you!

They don't take reservations for large parties and they don't allow you to coral some tables before ordering your food.

According to their RULES, you MUST stand in line like a bunch of fucking cattle being herded to the slaughter just to order your food.

You are FORBIDDEN from arranging any group seating before you have your food. You just have to role the dice, take your chances and hope your group can figure out a way to sit together.

In our case, the last couple to exit the line with their food had to sit at a table by themselves because we weren't able to move enough of Oklahoma Joe's furniture around to accommodate everyone.

That's fucked up!

If you want to attract a lot of people than you should make arrangements to accommodate a lot of people!

I really hate this trend in restaurants. I've never been to Cheddars because they seem to think having large groups of people milling around outside waiting to be seated a) Reinforces the idea that they are a popular place to eat, and, b) Socializing with other patrons in the wait line is part of the charming ambiance of dining at Cheddars.

FUCK THAT SHIT!

If your restaurant routinely has more than a 5-10 minute wait to seat your customers, BUILD A BIGGER FUCKING RESTAURANT AND HIRE MORE WAIT STAFF!!!!!

Fuck you Oklahoma Joe's, fuck you Cheddars, and yes, I'll say it, fuck you Strouds.

It shouldn't take longer to be seated than it does to eat your crappy, mediocre food.

10 comments:

Superdave said...

Well I for one think OK Joes is very over rated anyway.

And to top it off about every fucker I know wants to meet and eat there I swear what is the attraction?

The food to me sucks no real flavor and reminds me of deli meat.

Anonymous said...

A business, esp one as busy as OK joes, that is as successfull as this one has to manage traffic, how people get in and get out. You knew this going in, yet you brought a bunch of people, you could have done the take out and not had to deal with a successfull business. Out of towner's here about OK Joes from Anthony Bourdain calling it the best in the world, so deal with it.

Bottom line you knew how they operated, you went there and now you are bitching like a 12 year old, grow up.

Xavier Onassis said...

Anonymous = 1) I did not know that going in. I had never eaten there before. 2) I didn't bring a bunch of people, I was an invited guest.

The person hosting the event also did not know that OK Joe's didn't take reservations.

I mean, who doesn't take reservations? If someone calls and says "Hey, I want to bring 20 people to spend money at your business" who responds with "OK, well good luck. We will make absolutely no effort whatsoever to accomodate you or ensure that your experience is a pleasant one".

And if Bourdain thinks OK Joe's is the best BBQ in the world then he doesn't know shit about BBQ.

Superdave is right. Deli meat on a kaiser roll. I would have to put OK Joe's in the same category as Zarda's and KC Masterpiece.

If you REALLY want the best BBQ in the world, go to Gates or Bryants.

Xavier Onassis said...

And just so we're clear, I didn't go there for the food. I went there to hang out with my friends and I was VERY HAPPY with that experience. If they had wanted to eat at McDonald's, I'd have gone to McDonald's.

I Travel for JOOLS said...

I haven't been there but I cannot count the number of times I have asked an establishment to rearrange tables to seat a crowd. A "supposed" down home place like Oklahoma Joe's is not very "down home" if they won't accomodate this very normal practice in an establishment of their class. After all, they aren't exactly Plaza III.

Thumbs down.

Old Fart said...

I agree, Oklahoma Joes is glorified deli meat.

But, the "masses" like it. I don't go there. I also don't go to Bryants or Gates, because they also suck at BBQ.

As you stated, just don't go there. The only other option is to open your own BBQ joint to directly compete with them. Of course, I don't think Independence Xaviers would do a bang up business based simply on the name. LOL

Xavier Onassis said...

Jools - We were "allowed" to move tables around ourselves, without the assistance of the staff, but only AFTER we had our food. So our food was getting cold while we moved someone else's furniture.

Old Fart - I certainly won't be bac. And you're wrong about Gates and Bryants. You don't just have a different opinion, you're WRONG I say!

Superdave said...

LOL you all are wrong. The best BBQ in KC takes place in my smokers, on my deck and is finished off in my kitchen.

So in short unless invited I 90 times out of a 100 make my own BBQ tastes better is cheaper and I have great left overs.

"The D" said...

They did build a bigger place. It's at 119th and Roe.

Anonymous said...

Xavier, sorry for ressurecting an old topic. Most "order at the counter" restaurants operate just like OK Joe's, such as Gates, Arthur Bryant's, Rosedale BBQ, and Unforked. And also just about any fast food joint you can think of. It's just that they are usually not as crowded as OK Joe's. But you'll see the same rules posted at Unforked, for the same reason as at Joe's. And though it's not posted at Arthur Bryant's at 18th & Brooklyn, during the busy lunch hour you will be asked to relinquish your "reserved" table if you try to sit before you order. If you want reservations for a large group at a KC area BBQ joint, you'd better reserve a party room at Jack Stack or Haywards. Most other joints won't take reservations at all! That's just the culture of BBQ. So please stop with the FU's and get in line, okay?