STOP!!!
Stop whatever you are doing! Right now! And go check out this blog:
And then I said..
This guy is one of the most talented writers I've had the pleasure of reading, in print or on-line."Katy waits tables in a dark and eccentrically decorated Tex Mex restaurant just north of my home in a somewhat sad and dying retail oasis. The restaurant shares a parking lot with a farm implement, a fabric outlet store, an abandoned building or two and a Big Lots franchise. If you're not familiar with Big Lots, try to think of dank pit so skanky that even WelpMorque greeters won't shop there. (There's obviously no such place as WelpMorque but you're clever folk. I'm not allowed to mention the name of the nation's largest shit vending, bottom scraping, small business suffocating, local economy crushing juggernaut of a chain store in writing. Something about lawsuits, my job, contempt of court, total annihilation and other details that interest you little)."
Here is another inticing tidbit."As I turned to catch the spindle of discs I clipped my glass of boring American beer and sent a sticky wave flying toward Winnie, my curious and ever-present golden retriever who had been sleeping under my desk while I worked but who was very much awake and startled by this point. A glass of beer washing over her feet at the precise moment that a spindle of 50 DVDs, a bamboo blind and a fucking retarded cat crashed to the floor proved too much for the poor old hound. Winnie jolted and made contact with the leg of the folding table that I've annexed to grow my working space. The movement of the table was sufficient enough to cause one of my lamps to fall to the concrete floor shattering its light bulb and scaring the funk right out of Winnie's stank gland and in to the night for all to absorb."
That's all I'm givin' ya. Go to his blog and get the rest. You won't be sorry.
2 comments:
After reading what you posted I see that I'm going to have some long evenings reading. Is he local?
I honestly don't know. He doesn't seem to have an actual profile that would divulge that sort of thing. I'm guessing not. But I don't really know.
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