Trelvix over at And then I said has a great post on proper male urinal etiquette and the consequences of ignoring The Code.
"Approximately 5 seconds after I'd taken my position at the left-most of the 3 unoccupied urinals, a slovenly gentleman (I think he works in IT) entered the dungeon-like pissoir and assumed his spot at the middle post - directly to my right.
He too had made a choice and - back me up here gentlemen - he'd chosen poorly. When the opportunity for a urinal buffer presents itself, one must seize said opportunity. It's code. It's law. It's fucking common sense.
The slovenly one had violated the code by standing next to me and touching his penis when he could and should have been standing yonder and touching his penis from there. We all know this. Even home-schooled kids know this. It's built-in.
Fucking code breaker."
His response to this umbrage is absolutely perfect!