Tuesday, September 09, 2008

McCain * Palin - “Original Mavericks”



I love the fact that McCain and Palin are campaigning as two "mavericks" who buck the system, upset the apple carts, and chart their own course! The Republican party has never been so enthused and energized!

What The Fucking Fuck?

Question: Why was the Right Wing so dead set against McCain in the first place?

Answer: BECAUSE HE WAS A FUCKING MAVERICK!

They couldn't count on McCain to tow the party line, to loyally salute the GOP flag and blindly support whatever wrong-headed agenda they happened to be shoving down America's craw.

He had voted against the President too many times! He couldn't be trusted! Because he committed The Cardinal Republican Sin...sometimes, he actually made up his own fucking mind about issues and voted accordingly.

BLASPHEMER! APOSTATE!

Republicans aren't supposed to think! They aren't supposed to analyse data or question authority!

That's for those gay, Birkenstock-wearing, wine-sipping, cheese-nibbling, wife-swapping, tree-hugging, French-speaking, Volvo-driving, intellectual-elitist, terrorist-coddling, Liberal DEMOCRATS (spit)!

NO! Republicans are supposed to start their day with a download of Karl Rove Approved Talking Points and regurgitate as necessary. Ya know, the same way ya learned The Bible!



The Republican Establishment has HATED John McCain for years because they didn't think he was "one of them". He wasn't "on board". Wasn't following "the program".

And he wasn't. Until this election campaign.

He realized that being his own man, being a "maverick" didn't work for him in 2000 for all of the reasons I just mentioned. He couldn't win the support of his own party. They went with the incredibly intellectually stunted and easily manipulated Shrub instead.



But now, in the most incredible but completely unsurprising display of hypocrisy the world has ever seen, the Republican Establishment is enthusiastically whipping up a frenzy of support for their very own "John McCain! Maverick! Agent of Change!"

Horse.



Shit.

They swallowed John McCain's primary win with all the enthusiasm of a ruffied bimbo at a porn booth glory hole going down on some smelly wino cock.
[graphic ommitted in deference to your delicate sensabilities]

Now they are proclaiming it's the best thing they've ever tasted and everyone else should gobble it up too! YUM!

Watching the Republicans rally around McCain and Palin because they are "mavericks" is one of the most intellectually and historically laughable circus side shows I've ever seen.

What a bunch of buffoons.

It's embarrassing.

8 comments:

Donna. W said...

I'm loving this election year. It's turning out to be the most interesting thing on television.

Old Fart said...

Oh sure, make me look at a pile of runny dog shit (please tell me that isn't your own shit!) covered in flies, but spare my delicate sensabilities a porn booth glory hole picture? Now the terrorists have won!

MoxieMamaKC said...

"What The Fucking Fuck?" indeed my friend! I whole heartedly agree.

I'm learning to despise the word "maverick"...

My stomach is uncomfortably clenching...must. stop. now. Thank you for posting this.

I agree with Donna. Must See TV this year. The ultimate in Reality Shows. Because I'm convinced the election is turning into that.

Both parties have gotten SO off track of the real issues. "Vote for your next American...President" All we need is Ryan Seacrest doing the election night results show.

Anonymous said...

You right to the extent I was not crazy about McCain before Palin and I'm not crazy about him after the pick either EXCEPT for the fact I think he's smarter than I did before and I'm happy to see a woman on the ticket.

Smarter - why? He's got you all riled up hasn't he and he's got Obama all riled up too, to the extent he is blowing it and that makes me smile from ear to ear. I don't want Obama President and if Palin does it, well way to go McCain.

Actually as far as I'm concerned my dream ticket would be Hillary/Palin or vice versa. I like both of them for different reasons. They'd make a hell of a team and I bet they'd do more to unify this country than either Obama or McCain.

Xavier Onassis said...

travel - Obama isn't going to blow it.

I don't think all of Ms. Palin's skeletons have risen to the top in just a few short days.

Anonymous said...

Holy crap, I finally saw this commercial last night. And it has got to be the funniest frakking thing I have seen in weeks! They did everything but dress McCain up like Indiana Jones and have him swing on a whip.

Oh and I can't believer you Maverick picture included Roger Moore but not James Garner. Or where you dissing the "original" part of the ad?

Anonymous said...

Check his votes.

He's never deviated from the party line when his vote actually counted.

They hated him because he never got onto his knees and started sucking pole in Dobsonville.

Looks like Palin makes up for that.

Anonymous said...

Damn, what a rant THAT WAS! I did agree with most of it but I think thinking republicans have already written this one off and they're going to expect McCain to kick the bucket and they'll have a right wing Christian woman in there to go against Hillary.

The only question is this: Will she get us into a nuclear war when McCain kicks the bucket and Putin decides to bully her into submission?

I don't think her "I'm just a soccer mom" shit will work with Putin. He's the old KGB guy who poisons his enemies. I can't make up my mind if she's a Boy Scout like Jimmy Carter or a nutcase like "Nuke EM" Barry Goldwater.

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