The Saga of the Rug

As those of you who follow me on Twitter know, I have been on a Holy Quest for a simple fucking area rug to go under my coffee table and in front of my couch (seen above).

I knew exactly what I wanted. A 4' x 6' rug with a border, in greens, browns and tans with some sort of leafy motif.

Yes, I know that I sound incredibly gay right now. Not that there's anything wrong with that, so fuck off.

The main purpose of getting a rug was less decorative than protective. Protective of this area right here.



Because I'm single, live alone, and can do whatever the fuck I want without being accountable to anyone (Ahahahahaha! Suck it married guys!), I am free to eat my meals on my leather couch (with built-in recliners) while enjoying splodey action shit with ZERO emotional content on my big screen, hi-def TV.

If it ain't got aliens, superheroes, spaceships, massive explosions, naked boobies or harpoon cannons in glorious Surround Sound, I'm probably not watching it.

Consequently, that little strip of carpet between the couch and the coffee table becomes a "high traffic" area.

All I really wanted was a cheap rug that would fit with my decor to serve as a crumb catcher so I wouldn't have to keep deep-shampooing my landlords carpet.

I went to Walmart, Kmart, the former Kmarts that were now Sears stores. I went to Hobby Lobby, Pottery Barn and Cargo Largo. I went to Home Depot and Lowes. I went to JC Penneys. World Market came the closest to what I was looking for, but it was too Asian.

It was finally the wisdom of @hoochimama that saved the day by reminding me that Target has rugs.

Hallelujah! Rug found, quest fulfilled, obsession banished!



Let me throw out a pre-emptive FUCK YOU to some of my more Neanderthal visitors. I'm confident enough in my masculinity to include some floral elements into my mostly manly decor. Your homophobic opinions mean nothing to me.



It fulfills it's functional purpose by protecting the high traffic area.



And it fits in perfectly with my overall theme.



Less than $60.00 for the rug. I'm guessing somewhere in the neighborhood of $7,000.00 in gas looking for it.

Fuck my life and thank you @hoochimama.

That is all.