So, I posted this offhand comment on my Facebook page yesterday about how I was becoming increasingly "...convinced that having lots of cool female friends is way better than having a "girlfriend". 95% of the good, 0% of the bad."
While this isn't entirely true, it's mostly true. But that's not really the point.
The point is, a conversation ensued.
"MY BFF: lmfao!!! It's totally true.. I do way more for you than I would ever do for some scumbag boyfriend, and you are way better to me than any scumbag bastard loser fucking cock sucking prick boyfriend has ever been to me. lmfao! Apparently I'm having a day. lol
ME: This why we will always be BFFs! We take care of each other and we have each other's back!
MY BFF: Indeed we do my friend, indeed we do. See you tonight!
Sandy (old GF): He's baaaaaaaaaack
ME: LOL! I never go away, Sandy! I'm like a fucking boomerang. I might fly off on an adventure from time to time, but I always circle back to where I started. It's like a goddamn law of nature. But, you know this about me. ;-)
Sandy (old GF): Oh yes I do, that's why I love you and think of you often."
Then, after this kumbaya hug-fest among old friends, some Facebook troll dropped by and started saying this shit:
"Lots of cool girlfriends means you never find that one cool girlfriend...cant have both...shed the "female friends" and open the door to possibilities..."
"Cant have both...life is about choosing...Id love to have 2 girlfrirnds but it doesnt work that way....thats what makes them special, that there isnt all the other women around...most women who have a special man int heir life would agree...it sounds all nice and popular but it doesnt work...maybe the reason you havent found that special one is that you allow other women in your life..close friendships with the opposite sex is a form of intimacy..."
"there is a natural order of things (boundries) and one reason so many men and women are unhappy is that they fight that natural order...why do married people hang with married people...why do people seek intimacy with one person...its call intimacy...otherwise its not....you cant have a relationship with a woman or man and have all these other intimate relationships with the opposite sex..its unnatural"
Well! Needless to say, shit got ugly. My BFF went all Richmond on him, had a little "come to Jesus meeting" with him, and now he ain't so fucking "chatty" no more. In fact, he doesn't seem to even be online anymore. Deleted all of his comments and crawled back under a rock. Dayum.
But this too (although incredibly entertaining), is not the point.
The point is, I want to know your thoughts on the following question (BTW, this is asked from a 'straight' perspective...obviously a 'gay' perspective would elicit a different array of answers):
QUESTION: If you enter into a committed, intimate, long-term relationship with a member of the opposite sex (including but not limited to marriage), are you allowed to keep your close friends of the opposite sex or do you have to cut them loose in order to make your new relationship work?
P.S. - As a man who's closest friends are all women, including my first wife and many former girlfriends, I already know the answer to this question and am not seeking "advice". Just curious about what other people think. There are no "wrong answers".