Because Its Been Awhile

Saw this meme over at Moxie Mama's. It looked quick and simple, so I figured what the fuck. Here ya go my peeps:

Getting To Know You Meme

1. What was I doing 10 years ago? Living in Richmond, MO. in this house -

Working for AT&T (from home...thats my office on the lower left corner...largest office I've ever had...only office I've ever had with massive old growth oak pocket doors [which locked], 12 foot ceiling, stained, lead-glass windows, and private bathroom with a gold-enameled claw-foot tub). Been married (for the 2nd time) for 5 years with a 4 year old daughter (my only child).

2. Five things on my to do list for today.
Wake up with the alarm
Make it to the bus stop by 7:10.
Do some work
Leave work promptly at 4:30 to catch bus home
Get my drink on

The same five things that are on my to do list every. fucking. day. Except on weekends. Then I skip tasks 1-4. My little treat to myself.

3. Snacks I enjoy.
Is bourbon a snack? How 'bout scotch? Whisky? O.K., then, fuck it. Beer nuts. Although they wreak havok with my colon.

4. Things I would do if I was a billionaire.
First, I would pay off all my friends and families mortgages, establish college funds for all of their children, set aside a small monthly stipend for myself, and donate the rest to... HA! Fuck all that shit! I'd start spending that money like a drunken sailor. I'd buy this




buy at least one of these




take a ride into space on this muthafucker



and die dead ass broke one year later from a heart attack caused by snorting coke off of Angelina Jolie's naked body


while she is sprawled over the hood of my Pagani Zonda


which I have had custom painted to look as much as possible like this


after drinking an entire pot of this


5. Places I have lived:
This is so anti-climactic after 4 that I won't waste your time. G'night.